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The next question would be, now what?

I’ve vented all my anger I think. I don’t feel as angry as I did yesterday. Actually, I don’t feel angry at all right now. I’m still frustrated about the house and the situation we are in, but no more anger.

Anger does nothing but lead me down a path I do not want to go. I went to my best friend’s house today after work. I just needed to be around her and her sons. It was very healing for me. I got to vent and talk and cry. It felt good. I miss her when I don’t get to see her.

I still have a bit of the “fuckits” but not in the way of wanting to gamble. I don’t want to ever go back to that life. I have choices today and I need to remember that. As long as I keep making myself choose. Do I want to learn to deal with this in a healthy way or do I want to run and hide like I used too? Personally, I believe choosing to deal with it will be better in the long run. I feel it.

I have faith my Higher Power did not bring me to this situation and abandon me. I believe He will see me through it. The Higher Power I believe in would never lead me somewhere and not lead me through it.

Thanks to everyone who left words of encouragement. I appreciate all of them and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. This too shall pass.

I was going to go to the gym after leaving my best friends, but I suddenly just wanted to come home, be alone and nap off and on while laying on the couch. And then I remembered I don’t have internet on my laptop anymore cause I canceled the DSL and got cable modem.

I need to figure out how to get that shit back cause I love sitting on the couch and cruising the internet on my laptop. Makes things so much more convenient, really.

I watched the season finale to Lost and all I have to say is: WHAT A WAY TO MAKE ME ANXIOUS FOR NEXT SEASON!!!!! Holy cow!!! It soooo rocked!!! It was, by far, the best episode of the season. Figures, doesn’t it?

Grey’s Anatomy ended with a fizzle and Lost ended with a bang. I’ll still watch Grey’s next season. It’s my favorite show besides Heroes, ya know. The Heroes finale was awesome.

I saw the video for Moments by Emerson Drive today. WOW! This song makes me cry anyway. After watching the video I was sobbing. It has nothing to do with how emotionally unstable I am right now.

I’m not even off my meds. The doctor still has me on the Ativan at the same dosage and the Lexapro every other day, so it’s all still rolling around in there. I wonder if I’m PMS’n too. That would just suck.

Until next time…..

Technorati Tags: thanks, now what?, TV, anger

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