The Soda Stand

Archive for November, 2008

I had a pretty good day today! I got up early and met Miss Lacy and GeekyTaiTai for breakfast at 9am. Geeky was an hour late *cough* and so we got to meet her at 10am! However, I drank tons of coffee, was bouncing off the walls and then finally got to meet her!

We had a great time at breakfast. After that, Geeky hit the road for somewhere in Illinois and Miss Laci and I drove around a bit, went shopping at Payless and then off to the movie!

On our way to the movie, we were driving down the road where Boss Lady and Boss Man live (they are the couple I was working part time for and also KP’s aunt and uncle). In front of their condo were two ambulances and a fire engine. OH NO! As one of the ambulances pulled out and started coming towards us, I looked in the front seat and there was Boss Lady. ACK!

I immediately called KP and then I called Boss Lady. I got voicemails on both. We continued on to the movie theater.

I didn’t know what to expect with the movie, I had read good and bad reviews. I wanted to form my own opinion without letting someone else’s opinion color mine.

I can’t say it was the best movie I’ve ever seen, but I can’t say it was the worst either. There were a lot of key points left out of the dialogue and the character development.

However, if I had never read the books, I’m sure I would have loved it more. At this point, I’m going to give it a sidways thumb. Not a thumbs up or thumbs down, just meh.

After the movie, I called KP again to find out what was going on and it turns out Boss Man’s heart stopped. He was not feeling good while Boss Lady was on the phone with one of her sisters. He went to lay down. A few hours later, Boss Lady went in to check on him and he was blue.

The doctor’s are saying his heart stopped for approximately 40 minutes. They got it restarted, but he is now in a coma. It doesn’t look good for Boss Man. This makes me sad because he’s a very nice man and I would hate for him to pass. I’m trying to hang onto hope though and prayer.

I’m going to go take a nap now.

Until next time…

We got an email today that the City is making every City employee take 3 days unpaid furlough.   The only exceptions to this will be “essential” employees, however, there is talk that whether you are essential on the days the City Management has chosen or not, you will be forced to take those 3 days at a later time when you are not so “essential.”

This has caused quite a commotion here at work.  I can promise you that.  I felt a little woozy and then I cried a little because, of course, I got panicky on how I would pay my rent.  The first two days of the lay off/furlough would be in two consecutive pay periods.   My rent takes 90% of one of my paychecks, so that would make it so I couldn’t pay that.   (this is all the crap I was thinking within the first half hour of finding out)

Now?  I’m not so much freaking out as I am pissed off.  To lay people off at Christmas time just doesn’t seem like it would be a good way to “help the economy.” 

There is a slim light of hope though.  In our contract, we have a no lay off clause.  Furlough is defined as an “unpaid lay off from work” or something similar.   This means this furlough could be considered a lay off.  Which means, those of us covered under the union contract would NOT be forced to take furlough.  Which would be a good thing for me and the other 500+ members of my union.

It would be bad for Manager Lady and Trainer.  They are not covered by our contract because they are non-union employees.

I have a headache.  My ear ache has gone away, it seems, I don’t know.  If it comes back, I’ll head to the doctor.   After work today, I’m going to go home and check on my baby and cuddle her for awhile before heading out to a GA function on the other side of the universe.

Until next time…

I had quite the swoony day yesterday, as evidenced in my post last night. Good Lord. LOL

Josie kept hurting herself while I was here at the computer last night. I don’t know if she was scratching herself and it hurt her or what. And then it was bedtime. When I say “Let’s go to bed” she goes tearing into the bedroom and jumps up on the bed.

When she jumped on the bed, she yelped and then suddenly was this little ball of fluff that was shaking so hard I could not calm her down.

She shook all night long, not leave my pillow. Yeah. She slept at the top of my head, on my pillow. And then at one point during the night, I woke up and found her in the bathroom hiding behind the toilet.

I’ll be not only calling MY doctor today cause of my ear ache coming back, but I’ll be calling the vet to make an appointment for my baby. Hopefully the vet does Saturday appointments!

She seems to be OK at the moment. She’s on my pillow in bed, shivering. I don’t know that she slept all night. I can not find anything physically wrong with her. No cuts, no scratches, no bumps, no ticks, nothing like that.

I hate to think of it, but she is 8 and a half years old and I don’t know exactly how “old” that is in her doggy years. It makes me sad to even think of it but I did think of it last night.

I’m drinking a cup of coffee and then I’m going to go finish getting ready for work. Got to put my make up on and do my hair. I’m glad it’s Friday. Did I mention that?

Until next time…

It’s snowing. It’s been snowing since I left work. It doesn’t look like there is going to be much accumalation, but it’s still snowing.

I’m not cranky about it either. I had such a great day at work, not much could ruin my mood. I’m sure there are things that COULD, however, I’m not going to be letting it!

I started by day with a hangover headache that started to go away shortly after getting to the office. I was greeted by an email from Major Hottie, left overs from our email conversation the day before. I had emailed him and asked, what I called, a “silly question.” His response that I got this morning? “There are no silly questions. Just silly people with a question.” Oh the nerve! He called me silly! So we emailed a little this morning about that, and then I went on with my day. Grinning like an idiot.

At about 3pm, Manager Lady called me and asked me to pull Major Hottie’s check. I knew he was going out of town for a few days for a funeral, so this didn’t come as a shock to me. I pulled the check, gave it to Manager Lady and went about my afternoon.

10 minutes after pulling the check, guess who appeared at my office door? Hmmm-mmm yeah. That’s what I thought too.

It pleased me greatly that he walked to the back of the office, after picking up his check from Manager Lady to say hello to me. Pleased as punch. The grin has rarely left my face since.

I tried this MP4 converter thingy that is supposed to convert the protect music I have on my system to MP3 format. It keeps crashing my fucking computer and THAT may be the undoing of my good mood, if I let it. I don’t think I’ll let it.

I’m going to go on the couch, grinning like an idiot and watch some TV.

Until next time…

Post title is a song by Muse.

Thanks to Miss Lucy, I have all their albums now on my iTunes and I made a disc of them so I can listen to them on my way to work. If I had my iPod here at home, I would have updated that so I could listen to it at work too.

I think I’m getting too old to drink alcohol. I had two Pomtinis last night and my head is POUNDING this morning. You’d think I drank the whole freaking bottle of Smirnoff mix!!! Good Lord.

Today is the day I had chosen for Chloe’s birthday because I couldn’t remember exactly when she was born in November 2 years ago. We got her in January of 2007 and she was 8 weeks old at that time. Happy birthday Chloe, I can’t wait to see you next week!

I’m showered and dressed. All I need to do is my make up and my hair and I’m not feeling it. I have 20 minutes before I have to leave without being late, so I better get on it!

Until next time…

I’m copying and pasting from Rachel @ The Juiciest Bite.   If you can help her out, please do so.

I’m not going to go into details but at this point I’ll take any help I can get.

My brother is missing.
He was last seen November 11th at 1:00 pm EST in Bonita Springs, Florida.
He may be driving a black Acura MDX.

He is 5’10” or 5’11” and right about 170 lbs.

If by some chance someone has seen him please contact me at rachelcdoyle@gmail.com.

Please please please pass this around. I am begging you.

(Dan, if you read this I don’t care what is wrong please call me. I just need to know you’re ok)

While I’ve conquered Platoon 3 day (that was yesterday and the faking the “I’m really not a wuss!” face while getting a flu shot), I’m going to be working on Platoon 1 and 2.

Today is Platoon 1.  They are gathering for flu shots again downstairs.

Since it probably wouldn’t be a good idea for me to go down there and get another shot, I will have to find a different way to win over P1.

Platoon 2 is already wrapped around my finger (that would be why they brought me jolly ranchers last week.)  At least, two of the Majors are wrapped around my fingers, I’ll work on the firefighters next.

I woke up this morning with TWO ear aches and a sore throat.  My head is also pounding so loud I’m surprised no one else can hear it.   YAY me!  Can you hear the sarcasm in my voice as I say YAY?  If not, listen closer!

I wanted to go to the Immediate Care Center after work, but I looked at my bank account.  I’ll be going to the doctor on Friday cause that’s payday and that’s when I’ll have the co-pay and money for any prescriptions they give me.   Hopefully I start feeling a little better on my own by then.  I’m taking my Mucinex and some over the counter stuff that will hopefully help until then.

While at work, I was downstairs walking through when they got a call.  OH MY GAWD!!!!!  These bells and whistles and sirens go off and it shakes the whole freaking firehouse down there!  No wonder I can hear them getting calls when I’m in my office.  I jumped out of my skin, as did my Co-worker, when we were coming back upstairs.

I got to do some swooning over Major Hottie.  He came into my office to chat for a bit and then we were emailing work related stuff back and forth until I left at 4pm.  *swoooooooon*  One day, I’ll grow a pair and ask the guy out!

Until next time…

I spent 15 years working in a police department. I am no stranger to the way some of the male officers are. When you start working at a new location (new only to you), they stare at you for the first month or so, trying to figure you out. Who is she? What does she want? We don’t quite know what to think of her.

I started at the fire department and discovered very similar egos and attitude. For the last 6 months, I’ve been stared at, ignored and stared at some more, unless I’ve said something first or made direct eye contact while they were staring.

I’ve wondered what the secret would be to getting them to say hello to me first…not that it mattered because it really didn’t, it just would have been nice.

I discovered said secret today.

This week, the department is offering free flu shots to fire department employees. I went downstairs at around 10am to get my shot. The room was full of firefighters waiting in line, or not, to get their shot.

I filled out the form and the release thing and waited my turn. Several people engaged me in conversation and when I sat down to have my shot, 6 of the firefighters were standing over me, watching.

I did not wince when the nurse lady shoved the needle into the muscle of my upper left arm. Even though I wanted to pass out and cry like the girl that I am, I did not wince. Or cry. Until I got back upstairs to my office.

Each time after that when I went downstairs to smoke or go to lunch or go back into the building, each and every firefighter that saw me, said hello, engaged me in conversation and actually were quite nice.

I was in awe. I was in shock. Had I known it would just take me faking the “I’m not a wuss” face when I got my flu shot, I woulda tried to get a flu shot months ago!

My ear aches. It hurts. Horribly. I’m trying a warm, wet compress right now and if that does not work, I’m hitting the doctor’s office tomorrow after work. It’s horrible. I feel like a baby.

My ear ached BEFORE I had the flu shot. No conneciton.

Until next time…

Post title taken from Leave Out All the Rest by Linkin Park

I love Linkin Park. I have all their cd’s and I could listen to them over and over again. Sometimes, I do.

Payroll went so smoothly today, I’m at a loss of what to say about it. Trainer worked yesterday and got the majority of the calculations done so we only had to do the keying this morning. We had everything (including all the edits) done and approved by noon. BY NOON!!!!! We were 2 hours EARLY instead of the regular 2 hours late! YAY!!!

Also at work, I learned that in my contract (you know that union I was so upset about having to pay $50 a month for?) there is a “no lay off” clause, so my job is safe for now. The Mayor is, however, looking at unpaid furlough for some of the City workers. That is not covered in the contract. I can handle a week’s unpaid vacation MUCH better than I could handle a lay off.

I am very upset with NBC. They are canceling one of my favorite shows ever and it makes me stabby! Lipstick Jungle has been axed. I was watching the episode from Friday night and I was enthralled from the beginning to the end. Lindsay Price is one of the best actresses out there and I have a bit of a girl crush on Kim Raver. Kim Raver was in Third Watch and 24 (for those who don’t know who she is).

It snowed on me on my way home from work. I came home, got into my sweats and I’m not going anywhere now. I slept like crap last night after that freaking accidental nap I took in the afternoon after church. I might be going to bed very early tonight.

Until next time…

Before posting what I wrote a few days ago, I wanted to get permission/opinions from my mom and brother. My childhood was shared by them and I didn’t feel right posting something about my childhood without letting them know first.

I read a comment on another blog today that had me so upset, I almost lost my mind while at work. The comment spilled over into enabling behavior and denial. I could SEE into the unsaid in that comment to the point I wanted to get to this person who left it and FIX them!

And then I was reminded not everyone has insight into recovery the way I do. Not everyone sees themselves as openly and honestly as I do. Not everyone recognizes self destructive behavior in themselves or others.

Let’s look at this:

enabler: one that enables another to achieve an end; especially : one who enables another to persist in self-destructive behavior (as substance abuse) by providing excuses or by helping that individual avoid the consequences of such behavior

I grew up with an alcoholic father. It is what it is. I also know that the fact I am an adult child of an alcoholic, has shaped me in many ways. It has helped shape and mold me into whom I am today.
My mom did not enable the alcoholic and that would be why they were divorced when I was very young.

While he was out of my life for most of my growing up years, the contact I did have with him was not always the best. I look back on it and at the time, I was just so happy to be spending time with my daddy, I didn’t care that he was drunk half the time. I didn’t even care that Step Monster was drunk right along with him. I just knew that I was with my daddy and being the daddy’s girl that I was, this was heaven to me.

When I was 12, I remember my Step Monster throwing something at my dad and it actually hit me in the nose, causing me to have a bloody nose. It was a sleeping bag. My dad told me to go pack my stuff, we were leaving. They were both drunk.

When we were leaving, she tried to stop us by wrapping her arms around the steering wheel of the truck. My dad forced her out of the truck and dropped her over the fence into a puddle of mud. *giggle*

It was a horrible situation for a young, impressionable girl to see.

We stopped at a motel so we could sleep and I could call my mom. I don’t even remember what happened, but I ended up not contacting mom until the next day. By that time, Step Monster had called and told my mom that my dad had kidnapped me and was heading to Mexico or something like that.

Fucking seriously? What twisted mind does that to a mother? On the way home, my dad swore up and down, back and forth and 10 million times that he would divorce Step Monster. He would not be with her anymore for the way she treated me and my brother, etc etc. Blah blah blah blah.

Not even a week later, she was down in Vegas with him and they were the “happy” couple once again, feeding off of the other’s addiction and defects of character.

They enabled each other for years and years, constantly fighting and swearing to divorce the other. Years.

I try to imagine a life had my mother NOT divorced my father and I have to say I’m grateful that she did. I can’t imagine what shape my brother and I would be in right now, had he stayed around for our entire childhood.

Would he have stopped drinking? I doubt it. I sometimes had the impression that he found a perverse pleasure in getting drunk and then calling us to tell us how much he loved us and how horrible of a father he was/is.

For years, I wanted nothing to do with him. I disliked his life style, I disliked the fact that he was still drinking. He claims that he doesn’t drink now, but even that “non alcoholic” beer has alcohol in it, so whatev.

I have been building a healthier relationship with my father for the last 7.5 years. It’s on shaky ground most days, but the fact remains he loves me the best that he can, as I do him. He’s my father. I love him, but I don’t enable him and I don’t placate his ego when he gets into those self-hatred and self-pity moments of how bad of a father he was when I was growing up.

I tell him all the time he needs help. He claims he’s stopped drinking. I claim he still needs help for the damage he did to himself and his family when he WAS drinking. I do not allow him pity when he talks to me. I treat him like I do other people, blatantly honest, full of compassion and I throw the recovery program at him.

Why do I do that? Why do I subject myself to all of that toxicity, I have no idea. But he’s my dad. I certainly won’t turn my back on him, but I won’t enable his behavior either.

Learning some of the reasons behind some of my own self destructive behavior when I was gambling, and even since I have stopped gambling, helps me learn how to recognize said behavior.

If I let myself get into that denial stage I can say that I was not affected by my father’s drinking. I could say my relationships with men are not affected by my relationship with my father. I’d be lying. I’d be living in that dark hole called denial.

Until next time…