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Bent and broken

Yesterday, I set out to accomplish two things.  I wanted to go grocery shopping and then rearrange my bedroom and I did them both.

While I was rearranging the bedroom, I decided to open the blinds on the window and ended up breaking them.   They fell off all bent and broken.   I tried to fix them and couldn’t.   I left a few messages – one for the office and one for maintenance and then I hung up a blanket over the window.  LOL  It’s quite klassy really.

Today, I need to go pick up my prescriptions from the pharmacy, get some quarters for laundry and then do the laundry.  And that’s it.  I have nothing more on my list of things to do today.   I’m hoping it’ll be a quiet, relaxing Sunday.

I’ve been thinking about what that GA member said to me on Friday night and I’ve been doing a little journaling off and on about it.  I know that I sometimes get into these horrible depressions because I miss my friends back in Vegas.  I just let myself feel the emotions and walk through it, I don’t really sit and try to analyze those feelings.

I knew when I moved here I’d have homesickness and miss my friends a lot.  I just figured this was all normal and I know I will get through all of this if I just keep talking about it and journaling.  

I do know that I’ve changed quite a bit since I moved 1700 miles away from everything that is familiar to me and I’m trying to be patient with myself in that regard too.   Some days are better than others.  As a whole, I feel I’m doing pretty good, even with some of my fuck ups and self destructive behaviors. 

I’m working on it all and like we say in GA, progress, not perfection!  I try not to give myself too much room to wiggle though, because I’m an opportunist and if I have the opportunity to engage in something bad for me, I’m sure I will and I’m sure I have.

Here’s to working on myself, being patient and kind to me and growing as a person some more!

Until next time…

4 Responses to “Bent and broken”

  • Hilly says:

    I think I may have mentioned before that I grew up in a 12-Step household (my Dad has been sober for 27 years now). All of the little mantras, as annoying as they can sometimes sound, really do help.

    I’ve been thinking a lot about “progress, not perfection” lately as I too am struggling with some of the same things you are. I hope it gets easier for you as time marches on.

  • Sodapop says:

    Hilly, yeah they can be annoying at times. I have found, for me, that when they are really annoying is when I need to hear them the most, ya know?

    I hope it gets easier for you, as well. We are both going through a huge transition. I’ve been in the middle of it for almost 2 years and I’m still struggling. I hope it doesn’t last that long for you!

  • DutchBitch says:

    You did put the text we discussed on FB on the blanket, right?

  • Sodapop says:

    DutchBitch, ROFL no, I did not. hahaha Maybe next time 🙂