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Protected: New Year – new me?

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My week in a nutshell…

I posted something and then I deleted it.

My week has been exhausting and revealing. I get fatigued extremely fast. I worked part of Thursday (my first day back to work) and then all day Friday. I felt like I had worked 7 days straight. I’m approaching the one week point of being on these medicines and I know that it takes 2-3 weeks for these things to kick in and do their “job.” I’m trying to be patient with myself and just take it easy and not over do it. Easier said than done for me. I’ve been doing a lot of old school writing in my journal and I’ve been listening to Spotify on my phone. A lot. It helps.

The good news is, my foot has not really hurt all that much for the last week. I don’t know why that is. Maybe because I was in the hospital Sunday night and most of Monday and then didn’t do anything Tuesday and Wednesday except visit the doctor. Whatever reason, I enjoy walking without pain.

I woke up this morning to the news that a friend of a friend committed suicide last night back home in Vegas. Such a tragic loss for his family and friends. It brought back some memories of when a friend I worked with, committed suicide back in 1997. It was a horrible time for his loved ones and friends. I’m counting my blessings tonight.

Until next time…

Remembering.

This post was originally posted on 9/11/06. Every year, I like to repost it in memory of those lost that day that were NOT FDNY or NYPD or EMS or PAPD. The civilian casualty numbers are worth remembering as well.  Maybe next year, I’ll break the habit and post something original.  Until then, here’s a story about one of the many people lost that day – Stephen V. Mulderry.

Never Forget.

This post is dedicated to the life of Stephen V. Mulderry who was on the 89th floor of the World Trade Center when it was hit by a plane. All of the information I’ve gained is from obituaries and online websites dedicated to the victims of September 11.

The impression I got from everything I read, was one of happiness, family, love and generosity. It seems he was generous with his time and love and he loved to help people. I can’t say that I knew him. But I can say I’ve known people like him and I wish I had known him. People who take up the whole room when they enter. Their energy and magnetism just light up the room. There’s no mistaking the charismatic look in his eye in the pictures I’ve seen of him.

To the Mulderry family, I am incredibly sorry for your loss. I am also very humbled and grateful that I was able to write this memorial for your son, brother, friend and loved one. May you find joy and happiness as you continue to remember the wonderful person that Stephen was.

When I look at the picture of him, I envision a tall, lanky, happy man who is secure in himself and in the world he has immersed himself in. I see passion and strength. I see happiness and love. I feel a warmth spread from my heart, at the same time as feeling incredible sadness that the world lost someone like him.

Everything I’ve read on the internet has given me the impression that the man never rested. He was always doing something for someone. He was always working at something that he loved, like being a top equity trader and a vice president of the employee-owned investment banking and brokerage firm, Keefe, Bruyette and Woods. Even in high school and college, Stephen did for others. He worked as a counselor and mentor at Project Strive, in Albany, an after school and summer program for grammar school students.

Stephen Vincent William Mulderry was born on May 4, 1968 in Albany, NY. Stephen had seven siblings, Amy, Andrew, Daniel, Peter, Anne Connel, Alexandra Andreani, Bill and Dara. Stephen’s parents were Anne and Bill Mulderry. Stephen attended Bishop Maginn Diocesan High School. After graduation, he attended the University of Albany.

Stephen moved to New York City after graduating from college, to pursue his career. When he first moved to the City, he was delivering chocolate milk to bodegas and he was a bartender. It’s been said that he poured energy into everything he did. Whether it be work, family, or basketball. He loved playing basketball and played it throughout college, where he led the team as point guard for three seasons.

Stephen’s nickname on the basketball court (and probably other places) was Zipper. I’d say this was because of his speed and agility on the basketball court. While playing basketball in the city leagues, he was voted Most Valuable Player during the Lower East Side Hamilton Fish tournament.

Everything I read also told me that he was a gifted musician, singer and dancer. People have said he had a quick and kind wit. He was uninhibited with his appreciation of other people’s talents. In one of the many pages I’ve read, his brother, Andrew, had this to say: “He loved basketball, but he had four passions: friends, family, work and basketball. He was an incredible source of love and support for me. Even in the midst of this horrible circumstance, I feel nothing but blessed for the older brother I have.”

What an incredible source of light and memory we have. Stephen Mulderry, I pray that you are resting in peace. Know that we remember you and what you did while you were with us on earth.

Until next time…

Tuesday April 16, 2013

12 minute AMRAP:
25 v ups
10 deadlifts (83#)
4 rounds + 30 reps = total of 170 reps
then:
5 minute plank holds.

I had to modify the planks and do them on my knees, instead of my toes. Bending my toes back like that is excruciating so I modified it myself. They still suck ass though. That’s for sure.

Monday April 8, 2013

I’m determined to keep my fitness levels up and I’m trying to build a schedule so that I workout one day, rest the next, etc. We’ll see how I do with the schedule.

250m row
30 sit ups
25 squats
250m row
30 sit ups
25 squats
250m row
30 sit ups
25 squats
250m row

I love the row machine. It’s a great way to warm up the shoulders AND it’s a great way to get cardio into my workout without having to run or do burpees, both of which kill me feet.

Friday April 5, 2013

I can’t do much with my feet acting a fool lately, but I’m trying to get something in most days, so that I don’t put on weight that I’ve already lost and I don’t regress in my fitness. Although I’ve already taken a few steps back and HAVE gained a couple pounds.

500m row
50 squats
50 db push press (20# each hand)
500 m row
50 knee ups hanging from the pull bar

It was enough to kick my butt, while not destroying my feet too much. The rower DOES engage the ball of my foot and toes, but it doesn’t seem to hurt as bad as burpees or running.

Thursday April 4, 2013

My foot is bugging. The days I try to muscle through and just do a workout, ends up with me and my foot not being very happy.

100 v ups
50 squats
50 push ups
50 ring rows
100 sit ups

3 minute planks

I couldn’t do the planks – unless I modified them and did it on my knees. Which is what I did, but the foot was already enraged from the push ups and it was too late to try to save it. Ouch.

Tuesday March 26, 2013

This once a week workout thing is just not to my liking. At all. I hate it. I can’t wait for my foot to be pain free so I can get back to my 4 or 5 times a week. I miss my therapy, people. Seriously.

50 calories on bike
50 db press (20#)
50 v ups
50 ring rows
50 bench dips
50 push ups
50 lunges (unable to do these cause of foot)
for time
34:32

I couldn’t do the lunges. I had a foot doctor visit yesterday and he gave me an injection of alcohol. This series of injections will be 3 or 4 months before we decide on surgery. I’ve read REALLY good things about this treatment, but my 1st in the series doesn’t seem to have done much. Unless it’s going to take it’s time. The foot went numb last night and then today it was raging. It makes me sad. I just want to do burpees and box jumps.

Wednesday March 20, 2013

This one kicked my butt!!

1 minute on bike (for calories – get as many calories as you can)
20 sit ups

Continue until you hit 150 calories on the bike

I did 12 rounds of this before hitting 150 calories. It kicked my ass! Holy smokes. My abs are going to be hating me tomorrow for sure.

Bring it on, 2013!

I went to dinner with some friends (actually total strangers, but I made a new friend) last night for the birthday of a newer friend. If any of that made sense.

After I got home, I was resting my feet and thinking I wanted to go out. My feet reminded me I wouldn’t last an hour walking or standing anywhere, so laying on the couch with my feet up and all pressure off of them was the place I needed to be. I watched some of the NYE festivities on the TV and fell asleep about 20 minutes before the ball dropped in Times Square.

As I was laying there watching the party goers and celebrations, I couldn’t help but think about all the changes I want to make this year. I don’t make resolutions, I set goals. Attainable goals that I know I can reach. However, sometimes, I have no idea where to start on those goals and sometimes I fail at it. The only way that would make it a failure if I didn’t keep trying.

I have a lot of changes I want to make with the way my finances are and the way I handle them. I have made it no secret I have issues with money. Some of those issues are of my own doing and the others are not, yet I deal with them anyway because for whatever reason, it’s fallen in my lap to take care of. So I trudge forward, panicked, and not really knowing. I’ve reached out to a GA friend who is really good with money and he said he’d help me budget and get things on track this year. I’m hoping to meet with him sometime this month to get it started.

I have two parties booked for this month and one for February so far. I’m going to branch the business out and step out of my comfort zone. I’m not making any money if I don’t have parties booked. So I’ll be researching marketing ideas and ways to grow my business.

I learned a lot about myself with two huge situations in my life; one at work and one personal. And this is what I learned from them:

  • I learned that even when I tell the truth and stand up for myself, people will still throw stones and try to knock me down.
  • I learned who my true friends at work were and who was just playing at being friends to gather information and use it against me.
  • I learned my personal safety means absolutely nothing to anyone but myself and a very few select people.
  • I learned people would rather jump to conclusions and go off of “rumors” rather than go off of the facts and substantiated information. I guess it was more fun for them to do that.
  • I learned I still have work to do on myself when it comes to relationships with men.
  • I learned what I’m looking for and I learned what I don’t want. I learned I’m more accepting of situations than I originally thought.
  • I learned that I am stronger than I thought.
  • I learned that, at age 43, I am more comfortable in my own skin than I ever have been

I have a lot of issues with my feet right now.  One is an old situation that has gotten worse and spread throughout the entire right foot and part of my left.  It’s going to take a lot of treatment to fix them both and get me right again.  The doctor said that one of issues is very common (Morton’s Neuroma) and he wants to try cortisone injections to fix it.  He said it could take one injection, or two or three.  It all depends on how my foot responds to the anti-inflammatory steroids.  I got my first injection yesterday in the right foot.  I go back in 2 weeks for follow up on the right; injection on the left; and removal of the ingrown toenails that have grown back separated from the nail on the big toes.

The other problem with my feet is that my ligaments separating the five main bones of my foot are no longer where they are supposed to be.  This could be due to any number of things, including my workouts.  I’m willing to deal with that because I won’t give up my workouts on a permanent basis.

2012 was bi-polar for me on how good of a year it was.  Some of it was good.  Some of it was bad.  It’s amazing how we normally focus on the bad when we look back on our year.  I’m hoping 2013 is more good than bad and I’m willing to work to make it happen.  I’m hoping she doesn’t throw as many shit sandwiches at me as she did in 2012.

Happy New Year.

Until next time…